To the fellas

To the fellas,
To the brothers,
To the cock and the balls,
To the patriarchy,
To me,

We have forgotten how this ends.
Every time. We have forgotten.

This ends with a crumbling.
This ends with an empire fading.
This ends with a broken people bent under the weight of our ego.
This only ever ends with the stark realisation of how small our penises really are.

Surely there must be a different path
and another way
and a play we have never stepped out
or perhaps simply a group of people who could do this better than us.

Don’t they say that a problem can never be solved by the same level of thinking that created the problem in the first place. So let us put our small penises back in our pants. They do not think well.

Let us step down from the pedestal. Let us step down from the power. Rather let us give ourselves to the serving and the honouring and the standing alongside those power-house women that birth us and hold us and could run this world so much better than we have proved ourselves incapable of.

We have not proved ourselves worthy.
We have hurt so many and it is time for us to move aside,
press ourselves to the floor,
lower our faces upon the dirt of our transgressions
and beg our throats husk dry.

This pleading for forgiveness from
all the many women
who have suffered under our reign.

Forgive us.

Forgive us.

Forgive us.

I know that you know who you are,
you whom I plead for forgiveness.
I beg of you,
forgive me.

To the fellas
and the brothers
and the patriarchy
and the small penises
may we realise that we have not done this well.

Perhaps this is where true change in our world actually begins.

To everything that lives…

I say, “Grow little ones grow.
Set your mind to the task.
Give heed to that which germinates inside and
whisper to it night and day.
The flame needs the oxygen of breath,
so breathe slow and steady upon your burning.

I have heard it said that from little things the big things tend to grow,
so grow.
Grow tall.
Grow up.
Grow down.
Grow like wildflower.
Grow like weed.
Grow like oak tree.
However growth may find you, please let it, and do not stop.

Growing pains are only ever a sign of a good thing.
It is the way of all things living,
if we are not growing,
then somewhere back along the path we have died.
So grow inside.
A space that is large enough for the freedom of who you are becoming.
Surround yourself with those who arms are wide enough.

Let them hold your spaciousness.

I want to know you.
I want you to know
just how large you are,
and how lovely you are
and how every part of you belongs here.

So do not hold yourself back
out of the fear of intrusion
or rejection
or the awkward feeling of being seen.
Do not hold yourself back.

I wish none of us had to cover ourselves.
I wish I could be seen
like the flower is seen,
like the seal is seen,
like the mountain is seen.
In all their glory. Let us see you. In all your glory.

Place yourself in the world like an exhibitionist
that our eyes may life draw your presence.

I offer myself to you
like you offer yourself to me.
This giving freely.
Hold me.
I know you are large enough.
For who I am now and who I am becoming, hold me.

I need to know that I belong here, I need to grow here.
If you hold me, I promise,
I can hold you too.

All Photos by Candace Smith Photography.